Myself

In Service

Being-Of-ServiceI am going to be honest. Doing community service is not all fun and games. For me, at least. Yet it is more than just helping people, it is for a very selfish reason. To grow and stretch myself so I can be a better Sanjay for those around. It seems odd to say. In a few days, I will be staffing for a leadership program. The hours are crazy, preparation is key, and we get to be always seeming in control. I am scared shitless. Not just because of the time commitment, but the very real question, will I screw up other people? But then again, that’s always the reason NOT to do something. No more backing off. No more making excuses or finding reasons NOT to contribute. I get to be selfish. I get to be comfortable being uncomfortable no matter how many reasons I find NOT to do it.

It’s not easy, I admit, but complacency only goes so far. I admit it does sting when people mention that I post so many things just to show off when my only reason is to inspire. And yes there is pride. Just like others mentored me and allowed me to grow into the person that I am today, I now get to be in the same position.  So what the hours suck? So what I have to put other things on hold?  The point is for once do more for others than for me because ultimately it grows me. I would call that a Win Win.

 

Food For Thought, Myself, Preeti

Life Partnership

marriage-and-partnership-question-71010004258_xlargeThe warm buzz of a complete weekend still resides inside me.  Being witness to a couple taking the next step of commitment not only reminded me of how love progresses, but of how as humans we look for connection and a partnership.

What good are achievements if you don’t have someone to share them with?  We all need a cheerleader in our lives. Someone who believes in us more than we believe in ourselves sometimes. I admit it’s not easy to make the transition from a lone wolf to sharing all your moments with another. When my natural self is to always just count on myself, it’s a huge leap of faith to surrender myself to another completely.

Yet that is how a fulfilling life occurs. When you know someone has your back. Pure and simple. That emptiness in you dissipates when you know that no matter what, someone is there to listen to you.  Quoting my niece’s recent song “You matter,” that’s what marriage means to be. Someone saying to me I matter.

I am sure there will be some eye rolls at my post. After all, it can also sound like you need to be seen to matter. Or that you need to be praised. No actually, you don’t.  I just think that just like it takes two to create a human being, it takes another to see for who you are. It doesn’t matter as to gender, race or sexuality. Just that there is someone out there that you have a life connection.

P.S: Congrats Sabina and Ricky Sood. Looking forward to the wedding 🙂

Inpsiration, Journal, MITT, Myself

Uncommon Weekends

motivational-quote“What did you do this weekend?” A common question for Mondays. Before, I would spit out the same thing. “Nothing,” “Not Much,” “the Same Ole.”  That’s not to say I didn’t do fun stuff, but really, it  was usually the same thing. Now I can say I  volunteered on Friday and got to know an amazing organization, The Child Abuse Prevention Center in Orange County which does this amazing annual event where victims of child abuse and their families receive free school supplies, education, food so they are less isolated and know where to go for resources.

Then Saturday, I joined a new running club and met 12 committed runners at 6:45am (who knew people wake up early on Saturday?!), and discovered I don’t have to do just long runs to prepare for my running events but can do interval training. I was nervous because I am probably the slowest runner on the planet, and was convinced I would embarrass myself.  Instead, I met a group of committed people who were extremely nice and helpful.

Then later on that night, I went to an old friend amazing cookout and learned that I missed the last four years for no good reason. And even later, got to connect with some dear friends.

The point of this post isn’t to brag about all that I am doing (even though it sounds like it), but that ever since I started saying YES to ANYTHING that makes me nervous, my life has changed for the better. There is still so much to say YES to (travelling with the wife, finding new adventures, creating new experiences with the ones I love, and I now realize that uncommon weekends should be the norm not the exception.

Myself

Choices

we-are-our-choicesNew Month, New Week, New Day, New Moments. We get beginnings so often that we can sometimes forget how almost everything we do is a choice. I know personally, I choose to make the ones in my life feel a certain way. For my wife, I want her to feel only happiness and loves. For those in my life. I want to them to feel connection and know that they matter. For myself, I want to know that I am the best version of who I can be. Not to impress others or proves others that I am better than them, but for no other reason but I am on this earth to more than just exist.

So with each passing time, I make choices to do better, be kind, humble, acknowledge others, learn and keep transforming and pushing myself to be more than comfortable. This year’s challenges: travel more with the wife, be active, volunteer, have real friendships, check out more novel ideas, places and things. I am not content just being. That’s well, boring. Each day, I am blessed to open my eyes and know that there is more to do. Always the choices. I choose to be better. I choose to love. I choose to push myself. I choose not to be content.

What are your choices?