Immigration, Legal

Made to Feel Alien: Legal Reasons #46

Since the Trump Administration has been in power, I get weekly calls from panicked people asking whether their status could be changed or taken away.  There also appears to be a push by agencies to deny extensions or ask more questions in regards to reasons why certain visa holders wish to stay.

The ones most fearful are the ones out of status, or here illegally. With daily news on a purported wall and higher change of raids, it is hard not to wonder what can happen. It is important to get the most information you can from someone who knows immigration law rather than just listening to news, or a non legal source.

Each matter is unique and even if it appears that one’s situation is similar to someone they know or know of, it is always best to get professional help. Most attorneys do not charge for an initial consult or a very low-cost. Regardless, it is always to best to get that peace of mind because there is nothing worse than feeling like an alien in a country that has always been open to immigration.

Food For Thought, Inpsiration


Responsibility sucks.  It is so much easier to blame others, and drown myself in victim mentality. These past few weeks, I have managed to feel so sorry for myself that it was easier to say “I give up” than face the reality of responsibility.  Easier to fall into feeling like a failure, and blaming others. Easier to drown in emotions of grief, regret and self-pity. Here’s the shitty part: it doesn’t make it any better. So back to responsibility  I go. It means to get back up. To take a hard look at myself and see what it is that I am NOT doing. To really listen and check in with others and see where they are at rather that too busy ready to respond in judgement rather than just being present.

It’s not easy being responsible. It’s easier being self-righteous and be in judgement, but really what’s driving all that is fear. Fear of the unknown, being vulnerable, intimate and then be let down anyway. Fear of doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result, and then blaming others when respond the same way over and over. This vicious cycle where I rather be “right” in my thinking than looking and realizing that responsible leaderships ALWAYS looks at the other side. It comes up with win-wins not win-lose or lose-lose.

So back to responsibility I go. I choose vision over circumstance. Not excuses. Not Blame. But being the leader I know I am. I am a loving, giving and worthy leader!

employment law, family law, Immigration, Legal

It’s Just A Phone Call, Just Charge Me For That: Legal Reasons#45

I often get calls from prospective clients who just want “quick advice” or “send an email” or “make just one call” as their attorney.  They often balk when I mention my retainer and hourly rate. Rarely do people realize that as soon as I become their legal representative, a whole host of ethical, legal and practical duties come into play.

It is the very rare case where only one email, letter or phone call is required.  Besides, most attorneys need to know all the facts, research the law (if uncertain) and really understand what the client desires and the possible outcomes before shooting off an email or a call.

In this new age of fast responses, and ease of technology, it is even more so difficult to agree that it will be just one email, phone call or appearance. And as my favorite cousin likes to say, ‘ when you pay peanuts, you get monkeys.”

Food For Thought, Inpsiration


I did a ton of walking and thinking this weekend. It hit me that while on Social Media it looks like I am having the time of my life, many do not see the struggle it is to get to those moments. The mini pep talks, the telling myself to get out of bed to get some sunshine, the engagement with others, the expression of daily gratitude for what I have. But none of it comes close to filling in the gaping hole of missing someone who is no longer here. A foundation that I counted on so thoroughly that it never occurred to me that one day it would be gone.

So daily, I get up, do what I need to keep my sanity, keep my thoughts and feelings about my loss to myself because it just seems easier that way. Yet, there is a growing pressure inside me as well that this cannot continue this way. Being alone this way for so long is a recipe for disaster yet my distaste of pity and being vulnerable so great that I’d rather say I am fine.

But there is light here. I am reaching goals that I didn’t think possible, and there is so much I want to get done. I honor him but getting to places he couldn’t and that is enough. I also know that seeking support needs to become a habit because it sucks to go at this alone, yet it is not easy. I hesitated posting this because it will sound whiny or a grab for attention, but really it’s for the ones who look like they live the ideal life, yet feel truly, utterly alone. This will pass. I know it will. I am a loving, giving and worthy leader!

Happy Monday!

employment law, Legal

An Employee Just Threatened To Sue Me For A Missed Lunch! Legal Reasons #44

As Employers in California know, we are in a state with a tons of protections for employees especially in the area of wage and hour, meal and rest breaks. I often get calls from harried employers who, it seems, regularly get threatened with lawsuits by disgruntled employees. The reality is that while it is the attempt of most employers to ensure their employees get proper rest and meal breaks, call outs, scheduling conflicts and customer flow can interrupt those breaks.

Sometimes, it is also due to an untrained supervisor improperly scheduling meals and rest periods.  While it is understandable that some employees may feel that they can sue (my law professor  said, you can always sue, but will you recover, is the real question), they may be unaware that if they are receiving a one hour penalty for miss meals and breaks, their claim is significantly reduced or eliminated.

Moreover, an employer may consider offering a wage settlement if there are consecutive missed time periods. My point is that do not assume the worst if an employee threatens a lawsuit, always consult with counsel to ascertain if there is a legitimate claim or not.

Food For Thought, Inpsiration, My Past, Myself

Checking In

If you are friends with me on Facebook then you have recently seen an upsurge in my Yelp check ins.I always check in with a tinge of shame and guilt. The shame is usually that I feel as if I am bragging about what a great life I have, and guilt that perhaps I shouldn’t be posting so much. And why Yelp?  First off, it’s because I only check into places I enjoy and want others to have the same experience, and secondly any commentary I put there is because I want the people I am with know how much their company means to. These past few days have meant a lot as I was lucky enough to meet so many I care about.

Then there are also the non-yelp moments where I couldn’t check in.  A beautiful one hour conversation with an old friend in New York.  We have managed to keep going for almost two decades this way. And watching Star Wars on Kodi and then breaking into tears as I missed my father intensely to the self-loathing I feel for not doing more to better my life. The anger from an argument where it felt easier to blame another when in fact, they are a mirror into my life.

So don’t just look at the check ins and picture a wondrous life because the reality is that while the check ins are happy moments, they are plenty of emotional states one doesn’t get to see.