Sanjay Sabarwal's Blog

Yesterday, we took Zyan to the Orange County Zoo for the very first time, and while some may think he is too young (he is), just watching him careen all over the place, happy to be able to run and walk around so many people made it totally worthwhile. I have to admit, I also enjoyed it, and that was one of my secret reasons for taking him. I cannot wait to see and experience new things due to Zyan. Seeing him full of joy with the just us three is a special kind of time.

While it was a pain to get there and park as it was Irvine Park, I am glad we battled through that frustration to get to a new place for us. Times like this are what we will look back on, and I cannot wait to tell Zyan about his first time at the zoom, how he touched a snake, got close to a peacock, and ran past a bear and a jaguar without slowing down. It is these moments that I look forward to savoring in my quiet periods when he is not so young.

I want him to have my curiousity , passion for learning, being willing to do new things, try new experiences, be comfortable being uncomfortable, but most of all I want him to know he has parents who plan on being by his side as much as possible. Next stop (hopefully) the petting zoo or maybe San Diego or the Aquarium!

One of the main joys with Zyan is all the firsts he gets to experience which we benefit from greatly. Even thought he wasnt feeling 100%, we still managed to get him to the gurudwara (albeit late), and watched him take in the crowds as he wandered around. He is so eager to see it all. His walks mostly uncontrolled running about on his toes. He screamed occasionally (his new thing) at the unjustness of me stopping him going onto the street.

Yet the entire time there, I couldn’t stop expressing gratitude for even having these moments with him. A pang of hurt still reverberates as the ones that will never get a chance to see him, but its softened by his giggles and kisses. So much of the. year feels like its speeding along, and time with him so short. Each morning is one less that I will get in the future and that drives me forward to make them better.

Visakhi represents renewal, rebirth, gratitude, and the birth of the Khalsa where its recognized the need of unity and the great things we can achieve together. All massive things on their own, and to share a day like that with my son just makes it even bigger. I also get to teach him what this day means at some point which means I get to live it in the way so its more real life than lecture.

Each thing represents now a way for me to live and learn from so I can teach it forward. That’s a deal I can live with. Happy Visakhi!

With the beginning of a new month, and a new quarter for 2024, I spent time reflecting on my goals for this. year. What’s clear that there are some habits I get to get better at especially in the area of communication with those close to me. I speak in shortcuts which doesn’t always support me or become self-righteous or self-pitying that quite frankly doesn’t look cute on a 52 year old.

I also had some wins. From regularly getting up at 415am on weekday to get to my 5am Crossfit class, cutting down my sugar intake significantly, intermittent fasting an average of 16 hours (usually more) to finish reading 2 books (The EMyth for Attorneys, and Smarter Faster Better: The Transformative Power of Real Productivity ) to setting a daily revenue goal, focusing on the business aspects rather than just lawyering, and whole heap of under learnings.

There were some gaps as well. First, still learning to make systems a habit, and realizing it is slow going at first, and that’s okay. My impatience can become an obstruction at times. I get to learn to slow down. To take it in. Oh, just remember that I completed and sent out my first personal essay of 2024, and of course, it featured Zyan. And that brings me back to my life. Him. Suddenly, all of it makes sense, My drive to do all of these things has a face: his.

And so I begin this quarter imagining the biggest financial, emotion, and personal year possible. All of it so I can be a good provider, father, husband, friend, son, brother, brother in law, lawyer. What good is success if it doesnt make you the best version of yourself? Thats a question I plan on answering this year.

As we near the near of March (first quarter of 2024 almost complete). I continued on my journey of discovery. I learned that I am continually multitask in almost areas of my life, and it doesnt serve me. From sharing an article while in the midst of reading or viewing it to doom scrolling in the mornings with Zyan, to jumping to answer while my wife is in the middle of her thoughts. Each instance revealed my lack of presence and need to bounce around instead of just being.

In my quest to create systems, it hits me that those systems will only succeed if a) I complete them and b) I implement them and c) I stick to them. My need to try it all does open up new avenues, but there are far too many times that instead of taking the time to absorb it and really learn it, I jump to the next thing. That gets to stop now. It’s funny that I only realized this when I was in the middle of sharing an article about the negative affects of a cellphone based childhood. I wasnt done reading it, but my need to share so strong that I stopped and took the time to send it out to multiple people.

And then I watched a video on Focus and Productivity by the Huberman Lab and it hit me that the lessons I keep hearing are the same, put away the phone, get off social media, set an area that allows for flow and creativity, get bored, get comfortable with solitude, read, lean, be present, and mindful. I know this, yet I struggle sometimes because what they don’t tell you. its hard to do when you have apps designed so you cannot stop being distracted,. cannot stop getting that dopamine hit, cannot stop looking, feeling like you doing something when you are not.

It hit me that my love of learning can be a savior if only I can manage the need to jump around. So this new quarter will be about single tasking, being mindful, being present, because I also learned that I don’t have to be stuck with the past and present me. I can create a future me NOW (thanks for the great article Harvard Business Review). Besides the wonderful time I got with Zyan and my wife as well multiple loved ones, I got to think and decide on what it is that I wish to become. Pretty powerful stuff for the weekend.

Happy Monday 🙂

I gotta admit it feels strange to me to wish someone who is not here physically, then again, his presence so deep that many around me cannot stop themself in using his birthday as a reminder of what a life force he was. Silly, prompt in his habits, he snuck into many people’s hearts, and maintained amazing friendships and relationships with a surprising amount of people

Of course, his birthday has to be on St. Patty’s Day, a day of celebration, laughter. music,food, and of course drinking. Growing up, the drinking part didnt endear him to me, but as adults when I could handle him,. I realized that my image of my father had calcified as someone who had to be mature, had to just be a dad, not a friend, or someone to hang with, and that cost my valuable time with him. The regret is strong, but I am also grateful for the time I did get. We turned it around, and I am blessed for that time.

It’s funny how he roams inside my mind all the time, and i let him come out on days like this. There is tinge of sadness I admit but more and more its gratitude for what we created. His lessons I get to teach him grandson. Yes, I wish he was here, but in a way, he will always be there. And that’s something I can live with.

Happy Monday!

And so the 3rd month of 2024 begins, and I am still focusing on systems. I am currently reading the E-Myth Attorney which has given quite a bit to think about but the main thing so far has been a daily goal number based on the following calculation: Divide your dream revenue number by 219 days (based on several assumptions that are listed in the book like national holidays, weekends, and a 4 week vacation as well as the end of year slow down) which give you a daily goal revenue number to focus on. That caught my attention as the book states that most people who start businesses essentially create a job for themself rather than being entreprenuers.

It hit me that if I dont know what my intent is, if I dont have a system that works for my practice, if I am reacting rather than planning, I am doomed to just work as an employee rather than someone who runs a practice. And then I hit upon another video which gave me more to think about setig u your workstation to create flow. I realized that Systems and Flow go together so I am on the hunt for noise cancelling headphones, a standing desk along with a walking pad. I have read over and over again that sitting for hours not only isn’t healthy, it saps the energy needed to remain engaged in flow.

So besides intermittent fasting, limiting processed sugar, I will now add creating environments that support me in that which also means I get to meal prep, and support my family by cooking again (something I enjoyed in the past but have stopped completely). My list of atomic habits is growing, all for one reason: Zyan. To be around long enough to let him know how loved he is, to teach, to learn, to do all that I can to ensure he knows he is supported like I was.

Whats your Daily Revenue Goal?