Brownness

He Said…

He said to me . . . I don’t know why you wear a bra; you’ve got nothing to put in it
I said to him .. . . You wear pants don’t you?


He said to me . . …… Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
I said .. That’s a good idea – you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart


He said to me.. … What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him . …..Turn sideways and look in the mirror!



He said to me. …… Why don’t women blink during foreplay?
I said to him .. . They don’t have time


He said to me. . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him .. . I don’t know; it has never happened.


He said to me. . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and Good- looking?
I said to him . . . They already have boyfriends.


He said…What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
I said. . . A widow.


He said to me . .. . Why are married women heavier than single women?
I said to him . . . Single women come home, see what’s in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what’s in bed and go to the fridge.


 

Sanjay Sabarwal, Esq.
General Counsel
Ziba Beauty
(562) 402-5131 ext. 258

Posted via email from zibasanjay’s posterous

Brownness

Things to live by

“As we sail through life, don’t avoid storms and rough waters. Just let it pass, Just sail. Always remember, Calm seas never make skillful sailors.”

“When you make a mistake, don’t look back at it long. Take the reason of the thing into your mind and then look forward. Mistakes are lessons of wisdom. The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power.”

“Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to them all the care, kindness, and understanding you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again.”

Sanjay Sabarwal, Esq.
General Counsel
Ziba Beauty
(562) 402-5131 ext. 258

Posted via email from zibasanjay’s posterous

Brownness

New Perspective on Diets

NEW PERSPECTIVE FOR THOSE OF US ON ‘DIETS’

 

I love this Doctor…..  

 
Q: Doctor, I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?

A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it…. Don’t waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speed up heart not make live longer; that like say you can extend life of car by driving faster. Want live longer? Take nap.


Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does cow eat? Hay and corn. What are these? Vegetables. So, steak nothing more than efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef also good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And pork chop can give 100% recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.


Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

A: No, not at all. Wine made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine. That means they take water out of fruity bit; get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made out of grain.. Bottoms up!


Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

A: If you have body and you have fat, ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, ratio is two to one, etc.


Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise
program?
A: Cannot think of single one, sorry. My philosophy: No Pain…Good!


Q: Aren’t fried foods bad for you?

A: YOU NOT LISTENING!!! …. Foods fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetables be bad for you?


Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the
middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only do sit-ups if want bigger stomach.


Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

A: You crazy? HELLO… Cocoa beans! Vegetable!!! Cocoa beans best feel-good food around!


Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

A: If swimming good for figure, explain whales to me.


Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?

A: Hey! ‘Round’ is shape!


Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.


AND…..

For those of you who watch what you eat, here’s the final word on nutrition and health. It’s a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies:


1. The Japanese eat very little fat

And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.


2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat

And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.


3. The Chinese drink very little red wine

And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.


4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine

And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.


5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats

And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.


CONCLUSION

Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

Sanjay Sabarwal, Esq.
General Counsel
Ziba Beauty
(562) 402-5131 ext. 258

Posted via email from zibasanjay’s posterous

Brownness

Untitled

NEW PERSPECTIVE FOR THOSE OF US ON ‘DIETS’

 

I love this Doctor…..  

 
Q: Doctor, I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?

A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it…. Don’t waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speed up heart not make live longer; that like say you can extend life of car by driving faster. Want live longer? Take nap.


Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does cow eat? Hay and corn. What are these? Vegetables. So, steak nothing more than efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef also good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And pork chop can give 100% recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.


Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

A: No, not at all. Wine made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine. That means they take water out of fruity bit; get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made out of grain.. Bottoms up!


Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

A: If you have body and you have fat, ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, ratio is two to one, etc.


Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise
program?
A: Cannot think of single one, sorry. My philosophy: No Pain…Good!


Q: Aren’t fried foods bad for you?

A: YOU NOT LISTENING!!! …. Foods fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetables be bad for you?


Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the
middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only do sit-ups if want bigger stomach.


Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

A: You crazy? HELLO… Cocoa beans! Vegetable!!! Cocoa beans best feel-good food around!


Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

A: If swimming good for figure, explain whales to me.


Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?

A: Hey! ‘Round’ is shape!


Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.


AND…..

For those of you who watch what you eat, here’s the final word on nutrition and health. It’s a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies:


1. The Japanese eat very little fat

And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.


2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat

And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.


3. The Chinese drink very little red wine

And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.


4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine

And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.


5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats

And suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.


CONCLUSION

Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

Sanjay Sabarwal, Esq.
General Counsel
Ziba Beauty
(562) 402-5131 ext. 258

Posted via email from zibasanjay’s posterous

Brownness

Halloween events for you to consider

Sent from my iPhone

Begin forwarded message:

From: “Ones We Love” <contact@owlent.com>
Date: October 23, 2009 2:45:55 PM PDT
To: sanjay@zibabeauty.com
Subject: RE: Halloween events for you to consider

Email not displaying correctly? View it in your browser.

Halloween Newsletter:

Sometimes less is more.  If you are interested in celebrating Halloween, we have several events for you to consider.  Events ranging from an intimate costume party with 450 guests to the number one costume ball and rock concert in Southern California with 10,000 guests.  All we ask is that no matter where you celebrate Halloween, just don’t drink and drive because we love you.

Have a wonderful weekend,

Ones We Love

We kept is short so you could see the images. If you don’t see them go to our Halloween sites.

www.HalloweenOC.com

www.HalloweenLongBeach.com

www.AListEvent.com

halloween_at_tannins_640

halloween-2009-s1_850

wokcanoween-s1_770

—————————————-
Ones We Love sent this email to sanjay@zibabeauty.com
Questions? Contact Ones We Love or Ones We Love, c/o FanBridge, Inc. – 14525 SW Millikan Way, #16910, Beaverton, Oregon 97005, United States

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Posted via email from zibasanjay’s posterous