Inpsiration, Journal, Legal

October 1

It’s strange to think that in just three months, 2018 will come to an end. It hits me that after 9 months, there are so many goals I didn’t even get to, and perhaps it was a stretch to try to do so much. Yet it comes down to responsibility not as in blame, but in that instead of blaming others, my failure or lack of action was due to the choices I made and no one else.  It’s strange to even say 2019, but here it is. A futuristic sounding year, and I picture what it will look like. Will it be more of the same, or will I make gains in all areas of my life?

Again, it comes back to me. Everything I desire requires work and action from me not wishful thinking. If I want to improve relations with loved ones, I get to be present. If I want success in work, I get to do good work (the referrals will come), if I want to be in service, I get to show up and do those things. Over and over again, I am reminded that if I want change in my life, it comes down to my thoughts and actions. It has never been up to others or circumstances, those are just victim stories I can tell myself to give myself excuses.

Sure, life happens, but how I deal with it is still my choice. So 3 months to, I hope to end it with a bang!

Happy October (and Monday)

Food For Thought, Inpsiration, Journal

Papa Lives

Missing Loved Ones Quotes Inspirational Even Through Tea Cake Is Gone Janie Still Loves Him And Believes Hes – QUOTES FAMOUS

Only in this morning quiet do the tears come. Images of Papa, Baby Maasi and Bebo flood me and my soul aches. My heart hurts. There hasn’t been a day when I haven’t thought about them. I tell myself time heals, but really all it does is that I don’t speak about them aloud anymore. The silence in my heart suffocates my mind. I wish I knew how to express what it means to lose loved ones in successive order. Each loss a reminder that at end of the day we only get one life to spend with them. Regret chokes me up. So many missed opportunities. So much time with petty anger and frustration instead of loving them in the best way possible.

The worst part is being surrounded by ones who don’t know that feeling and offer platitudes that can never salve my gaping soul. So I wake up everyday and give myself the allowance to miss them fully and know that they loved me with all my flaws. Each morning a new chance to feel gratitude and pain. My own private moment that I chose not to share those close to me.

The words that come to describe the losses small, insignificant to the pain in my heart. Even now. I feel overwhelmed at the grief, and the words do nothing but just make it worse. Yet I get up each day with the hope that at some point it will lessen, then I will be able to look out the kitchen and not see Papa reading the paper, Bebo waiting for her breakfast and my aunt sharing a cup of tea with mom.

So I sit here, aching, hurting, grieving, and then I shake it off and remember them for they always were: joyful, full of curiosity, and always open to sitting down and spending time. And I work to honor their memory, and realize that each day is a chance to remember them.

And so I love their memories, but I ache.

Business Law, employment law, Legal

What To Do When Firing an Employee in California

1. Documentation of the reason for termination

What is the reason for termination? Is there a company policy that was violated? [Note: Is the company policy in writing?  Has it been distributed to the employee?  Is there a signed acknowledgement of the policy in the employee’s file?]  Who was involved in termination decision? Review documentation for termination if “for cause” and ensure this documentation is maintained in personnel file.

2. Final pay and accounting

Employers need to prepare the employee’s final paycheck and ensure that any unused accrued vacation time is also included.

Final wages must be paid within certain time limits, including the following:

  1. An employee who is discharged must be paid all of his or her wages, including accrued vacation, immediately at the time of termination.
  2. An employee who gives at least 72 hours prior notice of quitting, and quits on the day given in the notice, must be paid all earned wages, including accrued vacation, at the time of quitting.
  3. An employee who quits without giving 72 hours prior notice must be paid all wages, including accrued vacation, within 72 hours of quitting.
  4. An employee who quits without giving 72-hours’ notice can request their final wage payment be mailed to them. The date of mailing is considered the date of payment for purposes of the requirement to provide payment within 72 hours of the notice of quitting.
  5. Final wage payments for employees who are terminated (or laid off) must be made at the place of termination. For employees who quit without giving 72 hours’ notice and do not request their final wages be mailed to them, is at the office of the employer within the county in which the work was performed.

Employers should also review if commissions, bonuses, or expense reimbursement owed to employee?  Obtain all expense reimbursement forms from employee.

Employers with multiple locations need to ensure that the final wages are made available.  The place of the final wage payment for employees who are terminated (or laid off) is the place of termination. The place of final wage payment for employees who quit without giving 72 hours prior notice and who do not request that their final wages be mailed to them at a designated address, is at the office of the employer within the county in which the work was performed. Labor Code Section 208.

 3. Company property and passwords

Obtain all company property from employee and reset passwords.  Also, has employee returned all company provided uniforms?  Have all company keys been returned?  The company should also develop a list of all passwords employee had access to and ensure the passwords are reset.

4. Final notices

Employers need to ensure that all required notices are provided to the employee.  For example, common notices include:

  • Notice to Employee as to Change in Relationship (download here)
  • For your Benefit (Form 2320) (download here)
  • COBRA and Cal-COBRA Notices from insurance provider
  • Notify insurance provider
  • Health Insurance Premium (HIPP) Notice (download here)

5. Retention of employee files

Employers need to take measures to secure and save employee’s file, wage, and time records.

Food For Thought, Inpsiration, Journal

Personal Freedom

Today, my leadership call included the prompt  “What does Personal Freedom look like to you?” The question immediately brought to mind that when I stick to my personal routines and am able to do the things that bring me joy, I can be of service to others. When I get too involved in a task list, and move away from my daily morning rituals, I feel imprisoned and unhappy.

Yet it is also a balance. I also get to be present and be in acceptance when there are changes in life. For example, I recently had an employee quit mid-shift and instead of focusing on how unfair it was, it turned into an excellent opportunity for me to learn our new Point of Sale program. When I forget that Personal Freedom means aligning with my personal vision for growth, what feels like a burden becomes a reason to continue on that path.

It takes continual check-in’s to ensure that I am not doing things just for the sake of doing them, but that they align with my personal values.  For me, Personal Freedom looks like responsibility, Integrity, and Passion. It also means that I get to make a habit of knowing my why. It is easy to get lost in the busyness of life and others. It means to know the instead of filling my time with things to do, it should be things to go with my vision.

What does Personal Freedom look like to you? Happy Monday!

family law, Legal

6 Things You Need to Know About Divorce

1. Don’t Expect to “Win” Your Divorce Case

A lot of people start their divorce hoping to “beat” their spouse in court. In fact, there’s seldom a true winner in divorce. The typical divorce involves various issues, such as child custody, support, and the division of property. Rarely do divorcing spouses end up with everything they want. For example, one spouse might be awarded primary physical custody of the children, but may receive a much lower amount of spousal support than requested; it’s virtually impossible to tell the “winner” from the “loser” so trying to “win” is pointless.

Instead, consider the consequences of a full-blown court battle before you go down that path. In addition to the many thousands of dollars you’ll spend, your children may suffer the most in a heated divorce battle. After the dust has settled, you may soon forget who “won.”

2. Don’t Make Important Decisions Without Thinking Them Through

Many life-changing decisions come up during a divorce. For example, you may have to determine whether to you need to sell the family home. Resist the impulse to make a quick decision just to get the case over with. When making important choices, it’s essential that you consider the potential consequences.

3. You’re Getting Divorced: Your Kids Aren’t

It’s easy to get wrapped up in the heat of the moment. However, saying cruel things to your spouse in the presence of your children can have a lasting effect. Psychological studies show that the more parents fight during a divorce, the more damaging the whole process is to the children.

Whenever you’re about to say something hurtful give yourself some time to think before you speak. A simple rule to follow is to count to ten before you answer a question or make a statement.

In addition, unless there’s a history of abuse or neglect, your children will continue to have a relationship with their other parent. No matter how upset you are with your spouse, you should not try to discourage or interfere with a healthy parent-child bond.

You may want to consider asking an experienced mental health professional to counsel your children about the divorce, and seek counseling for yourself as well, so you can learn how to address your children’s needs during this difficult process.

4. Don’t Believe Everything Other People Tell You About Their Divorce

Your divorced friends may give you advice about what should happen in your divorce. Unfortunately, the information and advice you get from other people can be misleading or wrong.

Every divorce has a different set of issues. Your friends may believe what happened in their divorce is typical, but it’s best not to base your decisions on someone else’s experiences. Instead, rely on the advice you get from your attorney, mental health professionals, and financial consultants, all of whom are familiar with the specifics of your case.

5. Court is Not All That It’s Cracked Up to Be

When things are not going well in a divorce case, one spouse may threaten to terminate negotiations and head to court. However, the road to a divorce trial is long and costly. The expense of a trial can deplete the very assets that are often the subject of the dispute. Even simple matters can require multiple court days to complete, and after spending many thousands of dollars, spouses and their attorneys are left with the total uncertainty of how a judge will rule.

6. Create an Inventory of Household Furniture and Furnishings and Make Copies of Important Documents

Disputes over furniture, furnishings and other valuable items, such as a great wine collection or an expensive piece of art, can be avoided by taking a complete inventory of your home as follows:

  • take photographs of every item and photograph sets of small items, such as dinner ware, together
  • use the front page of that day’s newspaper in every photograph in order to create a “time stamp,” which avoids any claims that the photo was taken at an earlier date
  • keep your photos in a safe, protected place
  • create a list of all items, including where they’re located and your estimated value of each, and
  • get appraisals or ask for insurance inventories of the items in your inventory.

Despite the strict rules for disclosure, some divorcing spouses will hide or destroy key documents such as pre-nuptial agreements. This problem can be avoided by making copies of important documents as soon as you decide to file for divorce, or learn that your spouse is doing so.

Food For Thought, Inpsiration, Journal

There is Always A Choice

The more I fight the notion that I have no choice, the more it hits me that besides breathing, eating, and drinking water, everything else is a choice. It sucks. It’s so much easier to blame others, or events than take responsibility for my emotions. It is exhausting to step up and say yea x or y happened, but how I respond to it always comes down to me. It is easy to point fingers at others, and think or say that what they said or did caused me x or y emotion, but ALWAYS it comes back to me that it’s MY choice to respond that way. Every. Single. Time.

So I take time today to reflect on my choices, and really dive in, is what I am thinking or doing really serving me? It is not an easy thing. I struggle to dampen my emotions, yet I also know that if I continue on this path of feeling sorry or powerless, it will not only make life harder, it disconnects me from my loved ones. I keep forgetting that when I am not my genuine self either to myself or to others, I cheat myself and them of the opportunity to grow from those interactions.

Yet it is not easy. I struggle daily to not take it personal. To not be in judgement or resentment or really any emotion that does not reflect my responsibility in it. And so I begin all over again. A new Monday, to be in responsibility, respect and non judgement. Wish me luck.

Happy Monday!