Brownness

On Patience

This past weekend, I got a lesson in patience as I house sat for my family and their dog.I realized my preconceptions made it much harder to be patient until I just let go and accepted things as they were not as I wished them to be. Over and over, the lessons present to me the same thing that once I go into acceptance, my patience increases tenfold. It is when I worry or make up stuff in my head then do I make myself feel worse, and create extra unneeded tension.

I admit I am getting better at it. No longer does my heart pound when a new client walks in with a new situation, and no longer do I feel like am imposter as a lawyer. I see large leaps in the person I have become after deciding to take a private clients and so now I stretch further in my personal life. This weekend became a great reminder that letting go of anxiety is the surest way to enjoy the present and what looked like a challenge turned in well not much of anything.

Yet I do still seem to fall into this pattern of overthinking and not accepting the way things are rather than how I wish them to be. I realize that I do myself no favors when I insist on the world being a certain way or allow my thoughts to dominate me rather than taking the time to step back and just take it in. I remind myself that patience is not just for others but for myself as well. Then when I fail to check in with my impatience, I miss the opportunity to consider what is really going on with me.

Only in the quiet of the morning do I learn the same lessons but in a different way. I get to patient not only with others but myself which allows me to grow and become a better version of myself.

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