Brownness

On Group Trips

My mantra this past weekend was acceptance. Going on a trip with 14 others can be a challenge if you allow it to be. Once I accepted for what it was, it became like any other trip, steeped in connection, laughter, time spent together, deepening relationships, and just having an all around blast. I see that when I prepare myself, and allow things to be the way they are rather than how they should be, I just have a much better time.

Yet I still struggle with this. This need for things they they are “supposed to be” rather than how they are. The only difference now is that I am able to see that, and take steps to let go and just have fun with it. Which is what happened this past weekend in Vegas. Instead of just being about gambling or drinking, it became about great conversations. eating amazing food, and spending time together.

More and more, I see my desire to control things show up, my ego wanting things to be the a certain way, and it does not have the pull on me like it did before. There are slip ups, but I see that when I let go who or what I am resisting, I breathe easier, I enjoy myself more and it becomes about the present rather than some hypothetical future. I do wish that this was the permanent lesson, however I also know that checking in with myself is a great way to know what I am feeling, and there are times it does serve me.

Getting along just for the sake of it can also feel a bit fake so finding the balance has become my journey. This past trip became a great one because I allowed myself to feel and then let go of whatever that was not serving me. In the end, I am glad for that, and now I have some more great memories!

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