After many false starts and 2 liner blog posts, I finally find myself clear and calm enough to want to try and throw some words at this blank page and see if they stick. No more hesitation before plunging on the keyboard, no more wondering if I really have anything to say or just pretending so I can fill up the space in my heart and life. Yet for once, the blankness isnt there, the feeling that I am wasting my time isnt there, for once there is peace and knowing that I am getting somewhere and for now thats enough.
I dont know where I will end up but I know I am moving forward, no more dwelling on the past, no more I wish I coulds, now I am focusing on myself and for once making myself happy instead of others, and you know what, I now know that when I am happy, making others smile just isnt that difficult anymore.
Who would have thunk it? More to follow soon, I promise not you but myself.
Only then I can keep moving, grooving and feeling like I can take on this world. The answer was there, within me but I buried it between questions and despair, not giving myself a chance. No more. My time has come.