Brownness

18

I remember when I turned legal.  It was when I got my license, and the first time I was pulled over.  And in that instant, I became an adult as well learned the consequences of being 18.  But the moment was joyous because I was into a new world.  And today, I am 18 again in another way, and even though there are consequence, it is with a sense of happiness because we have crossed a threshold. 

Anniversaries have a way of making us look back, and really consider the present.  The road is sure paved with potholes, but it also has directions.  It may be a bumpy road but we are still getting near to our destination.  Getting to a number is a sign of change and also expectation.  18 is one of those numbers where a whole relationship is defined as is a person.  What was once child;s play now turns into serious business.  What was acceptable as a child is seen an immature and irresponsible on an adult.

18 is a long road to get to for some, and while the promises of love and greatness there, it is still a tumultous time.  So thought I look like an adult, there is still that child in me that needs to learn, and get better.  The rules have changed for us, and the excuses have to go away.  18 brings about a sense of responsibility regardless of whether we are ready for them or not.  Experience is the only help we have now, and ofcourse love. 

We begin again in a way, anniversaries have a way of doing that.  And yet another chance to fix what is so obvious all along.  What seemed simple is complicated because the emotions are the same but the actions different.  The love is there but pain is trying to drown it.  And its why its important sometimes to just have a do over. 

Midnight approaches, and even though a miracle wont happen, a date will.  A rememberance of the time past, and a chance to grow up.  It may sound familiar but I will become an adult.  I will try harder.  I will be 18.  I hope I can learn from my mistakes and be the happiness for the ones who expect it from me.  I made countless promises, and now its time to grow up.  18

Happy Anniversary Babu.  I love you.

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