Brownness

Breathing

It takes but a small breath and the tension can ease.  What seemed unbearable insteads lifts you to heights.  Gasping out love becomes breathing and sadness a distant suffocation.  I live for those moments when it just looks like one is about to fall off the cliff, you glide up and away into satisfaction. Up up and away is how it feels until flying becomes likes breathing.  And you think to youself why was this so hard to do?  The freeness just makes you dizzy, and life is being lived and you are taking on the day, and I say to myself I can do this! 

And then the moment passes, hurt gasses me, making me want to blow my brains out and what was once part of me now stands apart and looks at me with distaste.   Bile clogs me and I slowly sink into whine’s pool.  Breathing becomes a matter of doing rather than being.  And then again, Karma bitch slaps me, and I remember for each happy breath out, I have to breathe in bitterness and disappointment.  And we get better at it, we have to because if we think about it, it can become yet another task of the day, and if we just let it, our body just takes over and it goes back under the hood. 

Make sense?  Breath in….

 Breathe out slowly……

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